Entertainment

How to turn perceived ‘messy sex’ to great sex, by Tiwa Says

Published

3 years ago

December 4, 2021

Yes, sex can be messy, but it is also great fun.

Think of you eating any of our local Nigerian dishes, with your bare hands, the soup running down your hand and you lap it up with your tongue…craving every drop, not wanting any to go to waste…that’s how sweet and messy sex should be.

Yet, unfortunately, sex is seen as a dirty act that should be made clean and controlled Sadly, we have been taught to believe that our genitals and all it entails…from fluids to smells, are things to be ashamed of. This greatly affects our perception and acceptance of our bodies and how we respond sexually.

The truth is that you are not as dirty as you think.

A lot of people are in perpetual fear of smelling or tasting bad to their partners. These fears and disgust are mostly gotten from the myths about odours and bodily functions that produce them.

After normal body hygiene has been taken care of, these body functions are normal and not dirty at all.

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Still, no one wants to be told, they smell bad. It is a big turn off.

Let’s analyse some of these seemingly offensive fluids:

Saliva: also known as spit, is produced in the mouth. It is odourless, except you just ate something that has a strong flavour or you have oral health issues. Saliva is functional sexually in kissing, oral sex, and sometimes as a lubricant.

Sweat: sweat is totally natural — it’s our body’s way of keeping us from getting overheated. Sex can be a workout, but even if you’re having slow and lazy sex, you’ll probably notice a bit of extra perspiration. Still, a lot of people find their partner sweating to be a turn-on

Male pre-ejaculatory fluid: this is secreted in the early stages of arousal. It is also referred to as pre-cum. It is clear and slippery and can be used as lubrication. The smell varies from person to person.

Male ejaculatory fluid: this contains semen and prostatic fluid. It has a distinctive smell and is thicker in texture than the pre-cum.

Female arousal fluid: this is produced as a natural lubricant during sex. It is not the same as normal vaginal discharge. It has little or no odour, although that is determined by the state of the vagina.

Female ejaculatory fluid: like men, women also ejaculate through the urethra. It is a clear fluid that may also contain prostatic fluid. It can also be odourless depending on whatever has passed through the urethra before that time.

Rectal fluid: it is secreted by the mucus membranes of the rectum. It can give some lubrication during anal sex. It has a rather pungent smell.

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Menstrual blood: The menstrual blood is partly blood and partly tissue from inside the uterus. It passes out of the body through the vagina. Having penetrative and non-penetrative intercourse while menstruating is totally fine, as long as you’re comfortable and in the mood. For centuries, women have struggled with shame surrounding both their sensuality and menstruation. There is no biological reason to feel bad about either of these things together or separately. Period sex can be great if you’re open to it. One study even suggested that your comfort level with period sex could have major implications for your sex life overall.

Now that we have identified these fluids, here’s how to deal with them.

a. Use a condom: if you are not sure of what STIs your partner may have, or if it’s other fluids you are uncomfortable about, condoms are always a safe choice. They serve as barriers to keep the risk of fluid STIs to a minimum. This also applies to oral sex.

b. Because of the risk of introducing bacteria from the rectum to the vagina, it is always better to avoid moving from anal sex to other types of sex at the same time. If you must, use a separate condom for each act or save the anal sex for last.

c. There’s nothing wrong in getting dirty for some fun. You can always take a bath afterwards.

Above all, try not to get carried away in controlling what happens during sex sessions, know that there will sometimes be noises, gushes, smells and even blood. Always remember that all these are part of the real and raw human experience. Learning to accept this fact can help you to enjoy sex more fully.

Have a good one.

#tiwa_says.

Entertainment

Some ladies in movie industry ready to sleep their way to fame — Jide Kosoko

Published

6 days ago

March 23, 2025

Trends Admin

Jide Kosoko

Some ladies in movie industry ready to sleep their way to fame — Jide Kosoko

Veteran Nollywood actor Jide Kosoko has weighed in on the controversial issue of sex-for-roles in the Nigerian film industry, stating that some actresses deliberately enter the industry with the intent of using sexual relationships to advance their careers.

Jide Kosoko shared his views during a recent appearance on the Honest Bunch podcast, where he challenged the popular notion that directors and producers always impose such conditions on actresses.

He emphasised that no one can be coerced into engaging in sexual exchanges for roles.

“If I said I need you to warm my bed so that I can give you a role, and you said no, they cannot force you to do it. And if you want that role by all means, that means you want to dance to his tone,” he explained.

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The veteran actor clarified that while making such demands is inappropriate, the decision ultimately rests with the individuals involved.

“I’m not saying it’s right to have introduced that to you, but if you fall for it, that’s your own business. How does that concern the whole world? All this sex-for-roles thing, forget about it,” Kosoko stated.

He went on to assert that some women intentionally exploit such situations to gain recognition in Nollywood.

“I know some ladies that equally come into the industry with the determination that, by the time ‘I sleep with this and sleep with that, I will get my name. I know of some popular actresses. I know of even a Magistrate,” he revealed.

Entertainment

Asake reconciles with ailing father, moves him to specialist hospital

Published

6 days ago

March 23, 2025

Trends Admin

Ahmed Ololade popularly known as Asake and his father, Fatai Odunsi

Asake reconciles with ailing father, moves him to specialist hospital

Afrobeats sensation Asake has admitted his father, Fatai Odunsi, to a specialist hospital in Ikoyi, where Chinese medical experts are providing treatment, a reliable source has confirmed.

A neighbour of Odunsi confirmed the development.

Speaking in the local Isale Eko dialect, she initially requested more time, saying, “Call me again around 6:30 pm. By then, I should have gone to their house, so I would be able to give you more information on what you asked.” Later, around 7 pm, she confirmed, “I have confirmed from his (Odunsi’s) wife that he has been admitted to a specialist hospital in Ikoyi where Chinese experts are currently attending to him.”

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A source within Asake’s management, speaking anonymously, described the situation as an oversight. According to the insider, Asake has started fulfilling his financial obligations toward both his father and his daughter, Zeenat. However, the source could not confirm whether the artist plans to rekindle his relationship with Zeenat’s mother or provide financial support for her.

“The entire thing was an oversight, but all has been sorted. He has reunited with his family and promised to give them whatever they would need to keep him going. To the best of my knowledge, he has begun fulfilling the promises he made and that is why there is now calm. I have no knowledge of what has or will happen to the baby mama; what I know is what I have told you,” the source revealed.

In a viral video, Odunsi shared an update on their reconciliation, stating that Asake had pledged to buy him a new house and cover his medical bills. He confirmed that real estate agents were actively searching for a suitable property. Additionally, he noted that Asake had agreed to take full responsibility for his 11-year-old daughter, Zeenat. However, he did not address whether the artist would rekindle his relationship with Zeenat’s mother or provide her with financial assistance.

Asake reconciles with ailing father, moves him to specialist hospital

(PUNCH)

Entertainment

Actress Jayesimi blames mother for childlessness at 60

Published

6 days ago

March 23, 2025

Trends Admin

Renowned Yoruba Nollywood actress, Dupe Jayesimi

Actress Jayesimi blames mother for childlessness at 60

Renowned Yoruba Nollywood actress, Dupe Jayesimi, has shared the painful journey of her childlessness at over 60, revealing years of heartbreak, betrayal, and unfulfilled dreams of motherhood.

In an emotional conversation on Abiola Adebayo’s Talk-to-B podcast, Jayesimi recalled how she battled multiple miscarriages, a turbulent marriage, and society’s harsh judgment, all while carrying the weight of longing for a child.

Jayesimi, who tied the knot on October 22, 1988, said her struggle with infertility began shortly after her wedding.

Though she conceived before the marriage, she suffered a miscarriage soon after, marking the start of an agonising journey.

“We had too many tests, with several attempts to conceive,” she recalled. “My husband and I had misunderstandings, and five years into the marriage, he stopped checking on me for months. He began using a pillow to demarcate the bed, slowly pushing me out of the marriage.”

The veteran actress revealed that her husband ultimately forced her out, and just two weeks after she left, another woman—already pregnant—moved into their home.

“I resorted to taking alcohol and sobbing for years,” she confessed. “I had to move on when the pain became unbearable.”

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Following the failed marriage, Jayesimi attempted to find love again, hoping it would lead to motherhood.

She met an Alhaji who was eager to help her conceive, but even after two rounds of IVF, she was left with nothing but disappointment.

“One day, I conceived without even knowing,” she recounted. “I was 40 years old at the time. But when I went to the hospital, the doctor told me it was an ectopic pregnancy. I cried my heart out.”

After the painful loss, she eventually left the relationship when the man’s wife started waging war against her.

In her desperation, Jayesimi once considered adoption, but her mother vehemently opposed the idea.

“If you adopt any kid, I will feed them to death,” she recalled her mother’s chilling words. “It was then I knew I was in for a long ride.”

Now, looking back with regret, the actress blames her mother for robbing her of the chance to be a mother.

“If I had not listened to my mum, I would have adopted a long time ago,” she lamented. “I am not fighting her, but I want her to stay clear of me because she’s the cause of my childlessness.”

Despite the pain, Jayesimi remains resilient. She shared how she has been mocked—even by the children she helped raise.

“This acting job is just a blessing in disguise,” she admitted. “It has helped me sustain the watered ground of mockery.”

At 60, the actress now seeks one final chance at motherhood—not through marriage, not through failed treatments, but through adoption.

“What I want to do now is get a child who will be my company,” she declared.